Weaving words

She likes weaving words into sentences. 

I told myself countless times that I would eventually start writing again but I never did and never took the initiative to. It was something that has always hovered in my mind, "to write" "to write", something that I just can't quite shake it off.

Looking through my old entries, it amuses and scares me that I was so bitter and sad. 

Shit happens. People Break. Things Break. 

Resuscitate

This is my final attempt,
to resuscitate this blog,
to give writing one more shot,
to not be stuck in a rut,
to articulate my inner thoughts in forms of words,
to punch this keyboards continuously and insensitively,
to word vomit
to stop telling myself that this can wait

 and most of all to give myself another chance to dwell and drown in this inner world of mine.

2011

1. Went to Bangkok, Thailand in March 
2. Saw Gruff Rhys live at Maps in May 
3. Started working at Rosemary Bites in April
4. Went to Kota Kinabalu, Sabah in June 
5. Met the most important person in my life in June 
6. Started University in September 

Yes there has been a murder in the forest,
A deep thrust-ed wound in the heart of it. 

She stood there bare chested, trembling hands with a cigarette in one. 

like everything else, we vanish into dust then disappear into the abysses of the universe

 Today marks my turning of two decades, to think about it two decades isn't that long in year's length nor it is short. What an awfully awkward decade it is, it also depends on how long one life spans that determines the mid length of one's age. Birthdays have always been about celebrations and just well if I may, a down right selfish day that breeds egocentric narcissistic behavior. The day where I rule and everything must go my way simply because it's my birthday. I wonder how many souls have ever thought about the immense amount of pain that a mother bears on this faithful day. The day that you are born signifies another phase of a person's life namely your parents, parenthood, motherhood, fatherhood.Think about it, it is one significant event, one of life's most crucial moments, the anticipation, it's life altering, your existence in this world is not just mere existence its so much more to that.The day where unconditional love can be witnessed at it crudest moment. It's more than what we have always known birthdays are to be, look past the fancy presents and materialistic things and worldly goods, you'll see more to it, I promise, you'll see a whole new life tucked underneath this idea of what we have. It is also a day that brings distant friends together. As we grow, we grow apart from each other and for many years to come this day will be the day that brings us together, conversations may last merely a few lines picking up from the birthday wish and might not even get past how are you but it takes a person back to a time, back to a moment of what we've been and things that reminds us and that makes us who are today. Just dew drops moments of life shared with another being. I truly appreciate everyone who has been and still is in my life, I believe that we are all connected by this intricate web and that our life overlap each others for a reason, always for a good reason. Namaste

 We live such hollow lives

Wrap your limbs around me tonight and we'll fall soundly asleep together for the rest of our lives

Things break, People break, Hearts break
Marriages fall apart
Buildings fall apart
It happens all the time
Why are you so mad honey?

Tonight all I want to do is sink into a deep slumber, so deep that not even a hundred dreams could wake me up.

She said

are you afraid of death? he asked 

I used to be, not too long ago, 
before I realised that I have actually experience it or at least the death of something. 
Marriage, for instance, is the death of love. 

I have yet to figure out why people behave so selfishly and hypocritically idiotic. 


Maybe I'll never but it doesn't matter.

Could it possibly still be you after umpteen months?

Dear S.Kastin

Why don't you write anymore? 

Just like a stupid self destructive bitch, she stood on the edge of the stone, a heart made out of stone, a heartless stone like humanity.
my love, not even sorry can save you tonight, not when it has been said far too many times.

Heaven preserve us please.

She often finds herself drowning in the sea of her thoughts, when she's left alone
most of the time, she made it out alive
 but not this time, my love